ohhh i always fancy him

kian egan

rs amat fuck sekali

when u call ur parents

they asked whether u asking for more money

n saying they hv none

ok aku amat terasa this time

fine

i went to uk wif no MONEY AT ALL

ada x sampai 500 dlm bsn

n 540 dlm cimb

DATS FREAKING ALL

fine

bkn nk ckp apa

since i enrolled in thirtier education

most of my expends

comes from my own freaking pocket

n only when i moved in wif my sis

which all of my siblings finished their undergrad study

then

baru my dad pay for my freaking rent

b4 dat

its all my money

wif weekly allowance 150

or occasionally xtra money

dats FREAKING all

ok saket sgt

hati ok

i even pay for my own car

but for diz dec payment

i hv no more freaking money

since all my money finish here

soo cam mna nk bayar duet keta

ok

who cares

tarik la keta tu

fuck off

i freaking doesnt mind any more

*didie plis tumpang g klass nnt :(*

ok rs fuck sgt

aku jgn susahkn diorg

abehkn duet kasi org

pegi travell

4- 5 juta kali

langsung x ajak aku n leave me

then ckp x da duet

fine

fine

mayb i pull an arvind

skip this freaking last sem

n work my ass off

bcoz my parents happen hv no money left for MOI

fine

kawen jew

by kawen

akad nikah

who cares about d wedding

i juz meet them up at chillies

everyone pay for their own food

i'll bake a cake or sumthing

there goes my wedding

yes honey

i freaking dont mind

at least u can pay for our flat

i might b afraid or mouse n those smell

but i'll adapt it later

if ur parents wanna thrown a wedding for us

fine by me

it juz my parents happen to hv no freaking money for me

love u

love my parents too

but they can keep their freaking money

i.love.you

so much

it hurts soo bad when we r not together

i love

shopping

n eating

frost bites

bites me!

feels like im juz step in roald dalh house of fantasy!

love it here

d weather is solum like always

foggy n cold

hell

it europe

the nation of whitie *dats d reason vampire from europe not california!*

love love love it here

putting all my fat in good use

:P

my sis house is far away from the lil cottage i adore lining up d highway

spotted hills n mountain sound of music look a like

dayummmmmmmmmmmmmm

its darn cute

salmon pink wall in ma room wif white finish

adoring the cute door knob!

brass a lil bit higher but the door top isnt proportional

dats y the idea of roald dahl house of fantasy appear

u know

long legs

short body

its coming handyyyyyyy

lookin forward to LUSH shop

OMG OMG

can wait!

c ya later

lets pray for allah swt blessing

maybe

13th feb 2011 :)

been bz

kl to malacca to kedah to penang

ok
i juz wanna go back n sleep on my *i hope its not soaking* bed
i miss my home
but allah always hv a better plan n only test its follower bcoz he know we r strong enough
*mummy i wan a new house we make it like 4 feet above the ground plis!*

yes
SAYA MANGSA BANJIR

hello

im freaking sad
thats all

because each of us r different

different background
different family
different history
different life
but
sumthing similar between us
thats what makes us together
click
it wasnt sharing something
but similar
familiarity

lets talk about love
i think im blessed with my current status of relationship
enough to make me stop by for a moment
to ponder about it
but once
my fren said to me
i had my share of tumbling n chaotic relationship
n allah swt gvs me a lovely one
it runs smoothly
this time
eventhough the early period was kinda hard
which people judgin
assuming
since i jump out of my comfort wagon
into a new and foreign wagon
his life n mine
is totally not the same ship
but now i think we manage to tolerate
tone down
n grow up
together
but im only human
i still hv doubt
hope

my fren
having their moment of bliss too
they hv their own situation
they way they handle it
n i know its the happiness
is what we looking for
to kinut
i dunno why
but i think u n syuk syuk
is meant to be together :) stay strong
n don watch long distance film
believe in him n ur relationship
to nadia
u dont hv to worry
u r soo lucky to hv him
as u said
he is the gurl
no doubt bout the loyalty there
one day
you two will b in one place again!
fazeah mansor
u r one quite complicated relationship
as u said
jus accept wut u have now
if the future is a torture
y bother thinkin bout it
yet
honey we r 23
juz dun forget about it
syim
tlg kawen
enough
riena n naqib
dun get marry together
i need my didie
others
hv a gr8 life

soo sorry to talk about all of u
it juz i misses u :P

a quickie

no
not quickie in the toilet
A quickie on july till dec!

-started and recently ended my teaching practice weeeeeee boo ya SEKSA i freaking hates u
-this is my 1st sem of FINAL YEAR omaifuckingawdomaifuckingawdomaifuckingawd
-owh yea after 5 years i started driving againnn n my bf is my worst critic n enemy n my didie is my vertebrate
*sneeezzzee is this blog soo dusty? kinda if anyone EVER open it?*
-PARAMORE concert next weekkkk say YEAH!
-goin away this nov awayyyyyy destination SECRET!
-if everything went well as planned i might hv BIG by dat i mean huge, gigantic enormous NEWS *pray for it :)*
ding ding ding ding ding *gigantic grins ova my face alert!*

ok
later
bitches
by that i mean the two of u that actually read my blog!
p/s : thank you n i love u gladly leave me ur address so i can post u some pressie *kitkat would b fine aite?*

my fave ever

once upon a december mp3s
download FREE music

this is like my fav ever song on earth
if i am destined to b princess
i juz wanna b anastacia
the great mysterious anastacia

i kinda like this one, simple, suitable for merisik aite?

2 month after

ok

i feel the need to blog after i saw last post was on 26th july

this is da last week of teaching practicum or

TP as we affectionately called.

yesterday in the shower * i do most of thinking in the shower*

i thought about my experience there

n y i wasnt dat sad leaving da school

compared to previous sop n sep eventhough its like for 2 weeks

but my affection was taken to respective school

but not here

na ah

not SEKSA

then it hit me

the first week experience

seriously is to hear to bare

we r treated unfairly

just because we r from UM

which is silly since we spent 4 years in IPIK

but then

teachers there r not as open as they should b

well wut can i say

insecurity trumps morality

:)

nvm

i'll b waving bubbye soon

mayb on the friday b4 i go back i push all the stuff from gg taring table

or draw on her table "ur previous mentee from teknik is one lazy n fat arse" "there are none course for KH teacher ever in uni dats y u stuck in maktab!" "wut? u32? well my first payroll is 41! suck on it!"

or i can go to mr azim face 'u suck u know dat? n ur daughter is not so cute (ok this is mean)"

nvm

mayb i juz go back n snatch my tudung infront of school yard

ok dats uber dramatic!

hahhahahahahahha

okies

besh of luck for all cohort 4

trumps it hard~!

because im in the mood

so does him

in fact he is d one who triggers it

i dun wan princess cut

its common

i dun wan yellow gold

even if we can pawn it

but its my ring i wanna keep it n gv to my daughter even if we r not together

i wanna keep it in my legacy

i wan sumthing evergreen

i dun wan it cost to much

i wan it to be special

bt i think i need 3 rings :P

white gold plain band

white gold wif lil diamonds encrusted

platinum wif square cut in the mindle

being wif u

is more than enough :)

what would you do when

your whole life seems like crashing into pieces

you hv no clue wut r u doing

you in this alien enviroment


my solution for all that

CRYING LIKE A BABY ON HIS LAP!

works like a charms
juz cry cry cry
now im sleepy

liebe deucthland

ok this kinda nervous
more nervous than
argentina vs germany
bcoz
based on previous game
spain outwin germany

either way
im still deucthland supporter

liebe deucthland
gluck germany




*update : germany lost
ok fine
better luck next time

ahaaaaaaa

lets start this entree wif curse
lots of curse

fucking annoying bcoz its really suck!

whoever thought hvin gurls is easy
no its not
if u are married
i advice u
concieve a BOY
bcoz all i should do after 5 years
buy bikes
gv money
set curfew
they might broke it
but who cares
set up punishment later

u nva worried about
getting pregnant
kidnapp
cat fight

having 3 older sister
IS A PAIN IN ASS

its kinda fucking annoying when
they all concern about u
freaking fuckin annoyin
can u juz let me learn from my mistakes?
let me do one mistakes!

its fucking annoying i tell u
since they rather spend times worrying about u moving in wif stranger more than their phd thesis
or ur boyfren back ground more than they having one

for goodness sakes
let me learn it!
u got ur moment
n u've finish it
let me hv my moment!


fuck fuck fuck fuck

im past 21
its fucking my call!

its not like i dun love u

it juz im having a hard time consuming it

:(

its my fault
i deserve it
but being yell out
from u for the first time
is heartbreaking
changing my views on u
when u talk to me
i had goosebumb
cold hands

bcoz i really scared

scared to death

i know it wasnt intentional
n u apologizing
but
its creeps out of me
im sorry
i love u
but im scared of u
its d one thing u've done
but it gv
major impact

juz gv me time to re adjust
i love u
soo much

thank you

when sumone u love die

at least the love is still there
eventhough the body is gone
but
u know
the spirits n soul still loving you

how about when they still here
u can hear them
touches them
just the body
but u know
the love wasnt there
feels like the mutual feeling
adult responsibility
self respect n respect towards others
care
love
tenderness
wasnt there anymore

thank god im over 21
graduates
moves out
celebrating holiday alone
isnt it less heartbroken?

no matter

how hard
how sincere
i could neva be the good one

always b the one problematic one
the disturbed one
the stupid one

n will ever b that way

no matter how far u step up
build up
i could nevar b the better one

maybe i should just stop trying

yeah
maybe in the future
i build up my family
the nuclear family
when i gets old
plis leave me in retirement home
i'll b fine

you know wut?

im had it

im always trying to be the nice one
follow every freaking things they says
study quite hard to maintanin my grade
b nice
nva shout at them n all
n
yet im always b the wild one
im freaking wild
always on the loose
always go out n hits the club
am always gonna b the crap

soo i decide
if this freaking things happens again
that so called warning
im soo not goin back to alor star ever
even if my bf left me
im freaking tired of it
yeah
they paid my rent
not bcoz i asked them too
they offer!
they offer me a car
if this car gonna cost me my freedom
i dun want it
they can have it
bcoz im soo tired of it
if i ever heard those fucking things about
me ot allowed goin out at night
thos efucking thing im the bad gurl
im soo gonna flip again
fucking throwing a fit
i nva wanna go back home again
because it fucking hurtful
its like they could never trust me
fucking stupid
my fucking sister
who turning this house into my jail cell
is fucking hypocryte
u bitch
its not like u r erfect
acting goodie two shoes infront my parent
u r fucking stupid
if exhibits my flaws making u happy
then b it loser
u r fucking annoyin
always minglin in my business
if ur life is fucking horrifying
stop torturing mine

if my dad continue
making those accusation
im fucking not goin home
keep those damn car
i'll survive

owh yes

hello
im here
im doing nuthing
eventhough massive mess on my bed
n 0.5 mm dust over my floor

my family juz went back last nuit
a lil visit here
n so did surprise visit from mr policeman last nuit :P
meheartyoutooyayang :)

being lazy bum is kinda fun :)

i.wan.i.need.i.hope.i.dreamt.

latest obsession!!!




y it juz came out in 2009? when i was 22? y it wasnt there when i was 12??
pity my barbie for all the stitches!



of thissss

owh i nearly forget

well i did enroll in magazine publishing this sem
turn out didie and choki turn their back on 1001 computers n enroll in mag pub
n yes
soo is wenquq tua

in the end we end up publishing this mag,,,

yeah its kewl
i know

:)
made frens will fellow editors
they r awesome
even though lack of interaction
but on the last day

on ko k
it was gr8
:)

truth hurt

sometimes
when u learnt sumthing
dat really crashes ur heart
but u can do nuthing about it
even the comfort given its not enough

all you wanna do is cry
cry
cry

all thing taste bitter


bcoz sumtimes
people tends not to appreciates
when the love ones gv sumthing
we mislooked it
without thinkin about wut they feels

but when the wheels rotate
you fills in the shoes
that u feels
how simple thing could make u weeps


big time

this bz day

goin to b
n i havent showered yet
clean up n tidy my room : done
wash all those clothes : done
breakfast brunch and lunch : done
* i made tomato garlic pasta today n i admit i do cook good stuff *

16th march : due date for ethics got the book havent starts yet
24th march : due date for magazine ok it can be done no probs
31st march : due date for historical n cultural of science got materials already
24 & 25th march : those silly apk fest im selling stuff BORINK DRAMA ANNOYED

looks like im on the right track
mayb i should ask hayat for his asgment
muahahhahahahhahahahahha

lets shower shall we?

dear celcom BIS

u sux
to the max







thank you

penat x

klau asyik nk ikut dier
klau asyik dengaq dia ckp benda yg same
klau asyik ckp ckp benda yg sma
tp end up sorg gak


rsnya
its not too late to create new resolution
mine is
sy rs sy x maw kawen laaa
x payah pikir nk jaga org
nk ikut ckp org
nk dengaq apa dia nk ckp
nk senyum even though menyampah dgr apa kwn dia ckp sbb either x phm ataw its nonsense?

my new idol
is no longer katy perry or lady gaga
ada ada dengan dorg
duet?
gosh
my new idol is an old lady yg idup sorg bersama 27 ekor kucing kucing dier
sbb dia independent
suma dia wat sendiri
drive g bli friekies
bli baju sendiri
sbb dlm idup nie
nk harap org susah
eventhough org tu ckp
u dont need cars.. i can take u everywhere
or adik nk bwat apa keta g klass pong *l*** hantar
but whenever i really need them
owh.. rs mcm x sehat laaa
or i got things to do
end up
menyusahkn org laen
igt besh ka mx tlg org?
mmg laa benda kecik
tp klau slalu sgt
org pont muntah ok

so better b independent
naek taxi?
i dun mind but later i will get lectured...
klau kna culik mcm mna?
klau kena ragut mcm mna
bley sy jwp soalan tu skunk?

mind ur own bussiness
suka ati aku laa weyh
mx tlg mcm2 alasan!
laen kali klau aku ckp i need car
u better shut ur fucking mouth

rs mcm fuck
rs mcm bodo
sbb ikut ckp mak bapak
sbb kdg2 mak bpk percaya ckp
org yg bodo pandai blakon
in the end
i'll end up alone
best kan?
ada bf pont rs mcm suck
pegi mampos suma org
biaq aku jewww
everything happen mmg kwn aku bley tlg
tp aku bkn tangugjawap dorg
soo klau x bleu nk bertangungjawap
jgn offer apa2 dari mula
sedaq diri weyh
sapa hipokrit
soo wut aku x pkai tudung kt sni
mak bpk aku dh taw
daripd ank yg balik umah bwat mcm
omg im soo perfect
everyone is darn stupid
sooo stop acting like a saint when u obviously nuthing
it is not a good thing tp put people down juz because they r better than u

rs mcm fucking
saket ati n penat nanges ari2
sbb saket hati

thank you

for giving me everything
n snatch it back in front me
no more promises
no more pretending you r the best gurl
bcoz frankly
u r plainly self centered
ur lil role play always makes me sick
you cover up
always disgusted me

im not perfect
but i never pretended to b one
im a bitch
but i dun hide the fact
i dun kissed up
i dun threat others like they r matter juz
to ignore them later

simply
im fucking tired to witness it

r u serious?

ok this is the first

TIME

im meeting my bf's family
omg
owh
my
freaking
gawd

nervous till the part i cant think anymoreeee

for the kiss up part already done the deeds
bought bracelet for them
*i know im gewd!*

soo keeps my fingers crossing
wishing me the best!!!!
tganu
here i come!

you'll b the prince n i'll b the princess

yes syg
thank you
yes u did win my heart all over again

duncha juz lurve how materialistic i am?

thanx a lot for treatin me like that...

did any of my frens tips u on that ?

muahx muahx muahx
thank you
love u <3

maybe im not soo into you

or maybe i juz dont love u as much as i thought i am

or maybe its nervous talkin

or maybe its another "im so happy i could die" moment

i dunno

im sorry
sumtimes my †hought are mixed up with my emotion
thanx for showin me those pictures
sooo cute
i feels like pukin n thinkin dat u might not change

sumtimes

it freaks me out how happy i am
bcoz when life is full of joy
a bell rings
the flash back of hardness come out

i used to b happy in love
then the hope was crashed
n now i found new one
which also sounds promising
but
it kinda freaks me out
if maybe his love will decrease
when im increasing
bcoz i can learn to love
but what happen if our loves one changed
waking up without the urge to love me
lost interest in holding my hands

isnt it kinda bummer?
no
its not like im still hooked up with him
but as we understand
history is a reminder
that things is happening
war can be repeated
maybe things is like
the sweet summer
but we never knew when the sun will stop shinning?
or the wind went over blow?
its the hardest thing
when u have to accept
the person who is in love with u yesterday
juz
wasnt anymore
bcoz we cannot simply force people to love us
stop them from taking back their love
feeling is like an art
feeling is abstract
sum people might see it
sum people are juz dont

yes im in germany
but i juz cant take him back from france
but people are juz people
we changed
i changed
bcoz when we try sumthing that we thinks
its kinda bad previously
we experience it
n either change or stay on our opinion
arent we?
yes we r
maybe we didnt see it
but others will......

it juz dat
im not perfect
you r not perfect
i know ur flaws
u known mine
i dun mine urs
soo far u seems lurve my flaws
n i hope its for a long time
bcoz im keen being with u for a long time
i dun mind seeing ur big belly in the future
or sweepin off ur hair on the floor
or cryin over ur mis-words
bcoz ur flaws facinates me
my flaws makes ur laugh
n i like it....


*im period soo im emotic soo i dun care puke or what handle with ur own care :P*

is ur mama a llma?

hurm....
i dunno
is it my weakness
or it kinda a gift
or its the result of reading too much romantic n chic lit books
i think im easy to falls for sumone
n this time
i hope
it is the one....
like im kinda old
to start floating around
finding the electric sparks
or ionized against the others

its sorta complicated
but its complication makes me wanna work more n yes im not working alone,,,,
like TOKIO MOTEL sang : its automatic ok!
hahahha
*yeah i like their song*

n yeah
we hv plans
for us
n its not juz an empty one
both or us working on it

but sumtimes
its kinda freaks me out
it sumthing happens
bcoz its juz life
it will not always b easy peasie
but i kinda like the idea of it :P

yeah dear
i let you slay my dragon
bcoz u r my knight in hot policeman suits :P
i might hv no idea wut ur frenz r saying and
you might have no idea what my frenz are laughing about
but its ok behind the close door
we hv our own lil language
u might b silly at times
but ur innocents makes me melts
and i might b crazier than the cat lady
but i know u adore me for that :P
thanx for everything
i don mind jumping up for u
as long u dont mind falling down with me

loves u mr wolverine
xoxoxo

*for those happens to read this post
puking and nauseating is the result after reading
dun worry i dun mind :P*

its been a while...

since my last post
dunno y
im not dat bz
mayb lazy
yaaaa dats kinda true

but lately i've been too tired
4 days per weeks kinda tiresome :(

ok.....

such a lil bitch

click it

i know
i even hv tee to proves it

ok this is new

* click to enlarge *

kinda creative pick up lines
duncha think?

and yes

another reason y i extremely loves paris

juz a phone call away

thanx alexander graham bell
u r hot!

n right now
the sun is shining the right way
the shadow falls down on the right spot
flowers r blooming on the right day and location
scents of love n lullaby is around

simply bcoz im in love
*again*

thanx to the creation of telephone
n the revolution by mr motorola
u n me
we r meant to be :P

*read the article in GQ here*

mode : content

life is like a struggling fishing reel

one moment we felt like we had it
one moment we fought hard not to lose it
then suddenly its gone
then we try a new bait
hoping the new bait would bring us happiness

owh yeah

we both r still the rockstar

my divaness only can be tame by him

totally not breaking up :P
juz me being
hopelessly romantic
n uberly sensitive when my dreams or plan were crash

still me n mr policeman :P

i always say how i dun need bur it always come back right to this

owh
owh
owh
broken heart : round two

well this time
i hope it will b a lot better
since we r from two diff area
n i dun think
i'll b sein his figure
or glimpse of him in the future

OK thats the gr8 thing of dating the outsider
plz dun leae me currently monopolized my itunes
over n over again

well the main point
WHOSE TO BLAME

this time i can proundly admit
its me
yeah
mayb he is done
totally done wif my tantrum
yeah
we are from two different situation
hello still
hello quite
hello sadness
welcome back
kiss.kiss.kiss
we gonna rock this town

so0
the thing bout me n mr policeman
is history
so0 i back to normal
i guess

ok consollin my heart time
till we meet again =)